I Hate You, Jared Padalecki

OK listen up: just to be clear, I do not know Jared Padalecki, nor has he ever personally done anything to me to earn my unadulterated hatred or even mild dislike.  I’m sure that Jared Padalecki is a swell guy.  He probably adopts kittens from animal shelters and gives them to dying orphans with  twenty-dollar bills tied around their necks (the kittens, not the orphans).  That said, I think the guy still deserves to be punched in the junk.

It would probably be best at this point to clarify. For those who don’t know, Jared Padalecki is one of the stars of the popular television show Supernatural.  My fiance is a huge fan of the show and, being a good boyfriend, for Christmas this past year, I bought her Season Six on DVD.  As far as decisions go, this was slightly better than playing Russian Roulette with a machine gun.  Buying Supernatural for a woman is spiritually akin to buying her pornography–but with better looking actors.

Jared Padalecki plays the role of Sam, a smart, sensitive Joe who, along with his brother, battles monsters and demons and other meanies from Hell–all while questioning the moral and ethical implications of demon slaying.  Basically, the guy is a saint.  And if that’s not enough, he also happens to speak a number of archaic languages; is an expert with guns, knives, and hand-to-hand combat; and was accepted to law school at Stanford, but gave it all up to save the world.  Strength and sensitivity, brains and badassery, the guy is portrayed as the essentially perfect male specimen.  Women see this and it sets a standard that no man could possibly live up to.  Dammit, it’s not fair!  And it gets worse!

Lest you think that I succumb to hyperbole, let’s compare the average man to Jared Padalecki.

Average Man

Ok, this is probably not what the average man looks like, but doesn’t it make you feel so much better about yourself?

Jared Padalecki

That’s right.  Gaze upon the rock-hard, chiseled form and despair.  This guy’s groin has its own six-pack!

While I have no doubt of my fiance’s faithfulness, I fully acknowledge that a woman can only take so much temptation.  Under the right circumstances, I could probably be convinced to sleep with the guy.  I can only be thankful that my fiance has not called off the wedding in light of an illicit affair with our DVD player.  That said, I would just like to say that I hate you, Jared Padalecki.  Your godlike physique and breathtaking good looks are an affront to the natural evolution of mankind, and it will only lead to the extinction of our species.  After being exposed to your anatomical perfection, how can a woman ever be satisfied with the rest of us?  You’ve doomed us all.  Shame on you, Jared Padalecki.  Shame.

266 responses to “I Hate You, Jared Padalecki

  1. Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful….
    J.

    • Thanks for a great laugh. Yes Jared is gorgeous, though looking at your picture you’re cute too. Sorry some here took your blog a little too seriously.

    • JARED TWEETED YOU BACK!! Jared Padalecki ‏@jarpad

      To “Douglas W. Pope”: Thanks for a good laugh, I was just sent your “rant” & it made me laugh. Yes, out loud. So, you lol’d me. Well done.

    • I just read this this morning and I think you are a hoot. Yes, Jared is gorgeous, and apparently a very nice guy, but your fiance is a very lucky woman. For me, humor is a huge part of a relationship and your ability to poke fun at yourself like this shows me that you are a pretty secure guy and a ton of fun. And, you’re pretty good looking yourself. Best wishes to you and your fiance and keep writing!!! I’ll keep reading!

    • You LOL’d my husband, too. (you’re really getting around) Of course, his first response at seeing the pic was “there’s no way that’s really him”. Um… WAY, babe. :-) He’s SO thrilled that I’m going to Dallas to actually meet the ‘god of men’. Words just can’t describe.
      Great job!

  2. Just face it, dude…when God made Jared Padalecki (and his equally handsome co-star, Jensen Ackles,) She was having a really, really inspired day.;-)

  3. I think it’s really great that you used a photoshopped picture of Jared as an example. Pretty funny article all together.

  4. Let me guess, your fiance has the workout-scene as an endless loop on your DVD-player now? Poor you.

  5. Sad but soooo true!

  6. Now you know how we girls feel when you guise drool over the women on whatever screen you’ve tuned into… lol

  7. You sir, are a jackass. Get a life. Why dont you put more effort into doing something POSITIVE instead of putting all your effort into ranting and raving about someone you could never be. Grow up, get a job and move out of your moms basement already.

    • To be fair, it was meant to be entertaining, rather than an actual rant–my fiance thought it was funny. No venom intended on my part, but to each their own. Sorry if you didn’t like it. Maybe next time. Thanks.

      • Hey, some people can not take satire…it’s their problem…you don’t have to be sorry.
        I mean i love those guys, crazy love, but this was hilarious…I loved it.
        My fiance gonna have the same problem…bt with Jensen :) :’>

    • You’re the one who needs to get a life if you can’t politely respond. Learn some posting manners instead of resorting to childish behavior of name calling. He meant it tongue in cheek not bashing. I’m sure JP is mature enough at 29 to take it as given.

    • I guess you can’t grasp the concept of sarcasm. If Jared Padalecki himself understood, who are you to bitch about it? You need to pull that stick out of your ass and get a sense of humor.

    • I bet you don’t pick up on social cues well either. The article was meant to be, and is, funny

    • Sheryl Conerly

      Wow, no sense of humor, huh? Even Jared laughed. Douglas, I thought it was awesome.

    • can you not take a joke. I love that show,actually obsessed, but both jared and jensen reguarly snort cocaine during takes. Jensen is good about hiding it. But jared can’t keep his jaw still in any episode since day one. You took that comment waaay too seriously. I just wanted to share alittlle truth with you. Your reply sounds like an obsessed fan reply.I think it is very witty what he wrote about Jared. But sorry, they are both coke whores. Misha actually is responsible for the ratings increasing. Go and look at the nmbers and you will see. jared and Jensen are spoiled brats and they are lucky no one has written anything very bad about them, except me ha ha. It is the truth hun, they do have a liking to peruvian marching dust..What does his mom’s basement have to do with anything he wrote anyway.

      • Do troll harder.

        • Hence your attepmt at trolling. I’ve read interviews from guest stars and posts by fans that say Jensen and Jared are the sweetest boys around. I’m not bashing Jensen and Jared but Sam girls who think Sam is a saint and can’t make a mistake ever! Dean and Sam like their portrayers make mistakes. It’s called being human and actually makes them more interesting. Perfection is boring.

          • PS I can take a joke just fine. I hace noe prob with what Doug is saying but what son posters are saying. The need to defend Sam against the great villianess of the world as if an unreal character need protecting. Those who protect Sam need to grow up. These posting boards are for those to post what they feel not like you who post outright lies. “But sorry, they are both coke whores” You can nopt know this and it is rude and insulting to the actors to pretend you do know them so you can post lies. Your mental health is desperately in need of medical care.

  8. Haha! *pets you* Jared Padalecki is a force to be reckoned with amongst the men in the rest of this universe. *le sigh* … but don’t fret, I’m pretty sure his co-star Jensen feels the same way you do, and he ain’t so bad looking himself ;)

    • LOL i have to agree: he really is a force to be reckoned with. Jared Padalecki’s pheromones are so powerful, they’ve been known to warp the effects of the Earth’s gravity. Thanks for reading. Hope you enjoyed! :)

      • LOL love your article but whoa, don’t let Chuck Norris, the guy my ex-fiance had to compete with, hear you saying that. And in my humble Chuck Norris obsessed opinion, Jared while definitely sexy has a ways to go to be in the same catagory of godlike hotness as Chuck Norris. Jared get thee a total gym and you too will look hot even at 70!

  9. Agent_Valentine_Raccoon_City

    I am a fan of Supernatural since the beginning, and this made me LOL!!!! There’s going to be a lot of “die-hard” fans lashing out at you, but ya know what? It’s a joke. Why so serious Supernatural fans? Be careful or you will give Supernatural a bad name. Let’s not be like the Justin Beaver fans, mmmkay?

    • LOL thanks for the backup. Glad to hear you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading. :)

      • Some people enjoy causing grief because they have no life so they troll. As for fans who think character/actor can do no wrong they need a reality check. A recent book on SN mythology started with the statement that the Winchesters had such a passionate following because they were flawed heroes. Perfection is boring, not to mention making a saint out of a human being is just asking to be disappointed when said saint proves themselves just to be a normal flawed human. Enjoy the character/actor because all too soon it will be over, the show ends the actor will move on or worse theres the chance of loss like Heath Ledger, Brandon Lee. Thankfully in this day and age we have video not just for tv but family & friends because life holds no guarantees. In my career I’ve seen the loss of a lot of people who were like family so I never take anything for granted.

  10. On the bright side, in a couple of years, this may seem like a blessing. Once you’re been happily married, you can buy her season 8 on DVD, and she won’t even notice how much time you spend playing golf.

    Also, you forgot to mention how tall Jared is. Seeing as he’s 6’5″ that should certainly appear on a list of reasons to hate him. :)

    • To be fair, I’ve only played golf twice in my life. And you’re right about how tall he is: if his stunning good looks aren’t intimidating enough, he can tower them over you. Padalecki’s godlike attributes aside, I hope you enjoyed. Thanks for reading. :)

      • Yep, I definitely enjoyed! You’re a very funny man!

        BTW, Jared also enjoyed it, if no one has told you yet. He just tweeted this: “To “Douglas W. Pope”: Thanks for a good laugh, I was just sent your “rant” & it made me laugh. Yes, out loud. So, you lol’d me. Well done.” @jarpad

  11. Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo true :)))) I hate him tooooooooooooooo <3 <3 He's a sex god <3

    • LOL don’t worry. He might not actually be a sex god; he just looks like one. Who am I kidding? Look at him! On the evening that his child was conceived, there was a disturbance in the Force! Thanks for reading. :)

  12. OH darlin’. Just wait til you meet Jensen Ackles. ;)

  13. LMAO oh you sad, strange little man. He is a person, a new dad and a good husband. I have met and worked as his PA before. Just because you are so insecure in yourself to use that as a focus point to hate someone else, why don’t you put that energy into something productive and start exercising? It will help you feel better about yourself and may make your fiance take a bit more notice of you as well. The women on the show are beautiful, and we can’t all look like them either but we don’t hate them for that, for some of us it makes us want to put some effort in and boost our own self esteem.

    Grow up, for the sake of your future marriage.

    • In my own defense, I was writing purely from a entertainment/comedic point of view. Jared is actually my favorite actor on the show, and I always imagined that he was probably a really cool guy. My fiancee and I have a wonderful relationship, and I can only hope it continues to grow even more so as years pass. That she can put up with my sense of humor and obvious perchance for hyperbole only suggest that she was born a saint. If I gave the impression that I really bear animosity towards Jared, the fault is entirely mine and I, of course, apologize. Thanks for reading.

    • Joanne dear, he doesn’t need to grow up, you need to grow a sense of humour. He was very obviously joking.

  14. Me thinks your jealous of your girlfriend prefering Jared over you…never mind when you grow up, you’ll realise that she’s just having some time out from being with you and when you do treat her better she may prefer you to Jared. Good luck with that, I hope she doesn’t run out of time and patience.

    • Thankfully my fiancee seems to have the patience of a saint–either that, or she is possessed by the spirit of a 16th century nun with a fetish for self-flagellation. We’re still waiting to hear the results from the exorcism. My fiancee and I both have a healthy appreciation for the need for a rich fantasy life, and I would never begrudge her any fantasy that might occur to her. We’re comfortable with one another. I was writing purely for entertainment’s sake and if I came across as mean-spirited or serious, the fault was entirely mine. Thanks for reading. :)

  15. eek, that post sounds a lot harsher than intended :/ sorry. Please take with a pich of salt/tongue in cheek type humor.

  16. I have an illicit affair with my computer due to Jared Padalecki. XD Good luck with your fiancee man. (BTW…with your sense of humour, I would love to have someone like you as my man.)

  17. noone can help it if they were born like jared hes like a regular guy to us and we love him .they dont make them like him anymore.he is beautiful

  18. My husband has the same problem with Jensen Ackles. :) But he’s learned to live with it and reap the benefits of Jensen’s absence.

  19. BTW jealousy is one of the seven deadly sins

      • zing!

        Loved the post, and I can tell I wasn’t the only one laughing. What makes him even more detestable is that he is just as – if not more so – perfect on the inside. He probably DOES adopt shelter kittens and give them away with $20 bills tied to their collars.

        Incidentally, I found my way here via Jared’s tweet, which I see several others have quoted.

        Thanks for the laughs!

  20. Yep, definetly a guy to hate if he wasn’t so freaking delicious!!! Life is cruel….

  21. Jackie L. Vester

    OMG that was hillarious!!!!!

  22. It’s like you’re *my* husband! Ahh Jared.

  23. I’m a lesbian, clinging to the last fraying threads of my homosexuality in face of the power of the Padalecki.

  24. Glad to see you let the comments from people who don’t seem to have an ounce of humor roll right off your back! How can anyone think you’re being serious?! I thought it was hilarious!! Made me laugh out loud in a room with only by dog and scared her so much she jumped! After seeing and meeting Jared, I am finding it difficult to find anyone who measures up. Not to his physique. No one can! But to his genuine love and appreciation of people and the kindness he shows everyone he meets! No one is as sweet, kind, and compassionate as he is! I love him to death!!

    • :) Thank you! Unfortunately, harsh feedback is one of the risks of writing and you have to get thick-skinned about it, but entertaining others makes it worth it. I’m glad you enjoyed and I appreciate you taking the time to read and respond.

      • Humor is important especially these days. In my career we have what is called morbid humor. Some can’t understand how we can joke the way we do and about what we do but it’s either that or go screaming into the night until those friendly guys with the lovely hug me jacket catch you. We have a saying. “You don’t have to be insane to work here but it helps. Boy does it help!” Lol

  25. Lost In Tardis

    When I saw the header I thought for a moment you were serious (as IF anyone could really hate him – he seems like such a nice, genuine chap!) but your self depreciating humour – and photos – totally cracked me up! Your finance is a lucky gal to have such an understanding lad who embraces a bit of fantasy in ones life – I’m all for it! (and for the record: I vote JENSEN – he is killer gorgeous!) *smiles*

    • LOL my fiancee agrees with you about Jensen. He’s attractive in a different, more bad-boy sort of way is how she puts it. She just prefers the sensitive type. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading! :)

  26. That was awesomely hilarious :) Needed that today :) Really made me LOL. Supernatural just has the most attractive cast ever of any show out there.

  27. First of all, I can’t believe that people are taking this as seriously as they are. It’s a joke people!! You are the ones who need a life. Second…I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants!! Having met Jared a few times I can say that yes, he probably would adopt kittens and give them to orphans if he had the time!! Loved this from beginning to end…thanks for writing and just want to say…your fiance is a lucky gal :D

    • LOL I’m glad you enjoyed it. It makes me feel better to know that some people can take a joke. I always thought that Jared seemed like he would be a really cool guy, and I’d hate for people to think that I’m suggesting otherwise. As far as my fiancee being a lucky gal, I’m pretty sure that I’m the lucky one. Thanks for reading. :)

  28. This is really funny! Loved it!
    P.S: Jared Padalecki is a work of art and its almost impossible for any human being to beat that.

    • LOL I’m glad you enjoyed it. I’m sure that a lot of women would agree that Michelangelo was using the wrong model when he created the statue of David. Thanks for reading. :)

  29. This is really funny, loved it! :D
    P.S:Jared Padalecki is a work of art and its as good as impossible to beat that.

  30. Sarah Thompson

    I am not lusting after Jared Padalecki, I am actually pretty happy for him :) I think he is a real awesome actor! I just wish that I could get him to talk with me on twitter lol! That would make me happy :) I was talking with an impostor on facebook and realized I did because I wanted to feel like I could be his friend lol! I did enjoy your article thanks for writing it!!

  31. I loved your article. So funny! Jared is a hottie for a young bloke. But we don’t want perfection all the time. It just spices things up. I’m sure he sits on the toilet to take a sh#t and occasionally picks his nose (not so perfect now). I wouldn’t kick him out of bed.

    • LMAO that’s one of the best perspectives I’ve ever heard. I had to stop laughing before I could even respond to it. But, yes, I’m glad to hear that perfection is always necessary. It’s just fun to look at from time to time. Thank God I never thought about writing an article on how Jared takes a sh#t like everyone else. I probably would’ve been crucified. I’m glad you enjoyed the article. Thanks for reading.

    • Check out the gag reels. That boy has a finger up his nose at least once in every gag reel. LOL In Season 1 gag reel twice that I remember he was dealing with nasal issues. Filming in the cold makes anyone have nasal issues.

  32. What you have overlooked is: When she is done looking at Jared, there is Jensen….every girl loves a bad guy!

    • LOL oh trust me, she has not missed Jensen. She just prefers the sensitive type. She has love to spare for the bad boy. Thanks for reading! :)

      • The problem with Dean is the same with John. Both despite being bad boys are also sensitive. Double threat. Jensen himself said he wasn’t anything special all humble like and a room full of women erupted trying to let him know he was at least to them.

  33. I personally feel Jared Padalecki is among the top five best-looking actors in Hollywood. (And he ain’t too bad at the acting thing, either!) The guy is literally beautiful. Not a single flaw. Your wife has excellent taste, I must say. And while it’s wholly unfair to the straight up dudes, he’s like heaven on Earth for women and gay guys everywhere. My only wish is that they have him “forget” his shirt more often on the show. Also maybe his pants but that might be wishing for too much.

  34. What? so you hate him because he works out everyday. The guy likes to be healthy and when you work out you look like that. I think the man is very handsome, and I love the show. but he’s personality is really great, and that’s what I liked first about him..his body was just a bonus. LOL! but really, calm down. You want to punch him in the junk, because he looks good?!

    I hope your just trolling. really please be trolling, because to be mad at someone just because they look good, you must really hate your own body. haaaa.

    • In my defense, the article was strictly meant as comedy/entertainment. I actually enjoy Jared’s performance; he is my favorite actor in the show. I bear no animosity for Jared Padalecki whatsoever, and I assure you that his junk is in no danger from my lashing out. That said, if I somehow came across as being serious and mean-spirited in the article, the fault is entirely mine and I apologize. Thank you for taking the time to read and respond. :)

      P.S.

      Actually, for the most part, I’m pretty comfortable with my own body. It may not be as awesome as Jared’s, but it suits me well enough. I’m attached to it. But, thank you for your concern about my self-esteem. :)

  35. haha thanks for recognizing the force that is Jared Padalecki, He has ruined me.

  36. This is delightful. I laughed all the way through. But what on earth is wrong with the people who took it seriously? I feel sorry for anyone who can’t recognize sarcastic humor when it bites them in the ass. (And speaking of ass. . . Jared Padalecki looks pretty good from the back, too!)

  37. This really made me smile!
    He is really a bit otherworldly and unreachable, right? But rest assured, I’m pretty sure he’s the kind of guy who’s not going to go stray, with wife and kid and dogs and all. Which… makes him even MORE of a god in men’s eyes, right?
    I think you really can’t win. Though to be fair, Sam Winchester has a bit of a demon-blood-addiction-problem, not to mention some insanity-issues he later developed (I hope I’m not spoiling you?), so there is room for you to pull your fiancée to your side.

    Good luck for marriage, and I’m sure with your sense of humour, you and your woman will be fine :-)

    • LOL Thank you very much. Don’t worry, you’re not spoiling for me; I’m pretty well caught up through most of the current season. My fiancee and I are just watching all the seasons on DVD in order. It’s been an activity that we’ve enjoyed together (we’re also watching Dexter, Warehouse 13, and Mad Men). I appreciate the good wishes and I’m glad you enjoyed. Thanks for reading! :)

  38. I too read this completely wrong *blush*, after chatting with some Jensen and Jared friends on line we realised it was done with tongue in cheek. Sadly we read this at a time when there is someone out there not just bashing Jared but making threats too. She’s been doing it for sometime and has even wished their new born baby dead. So I feel I over reacted BIG TIME. My apologies, you really are a nice guy after all. Hmmm, competition for Jared…lets see a picture of you instead of the guy in the little speedo’s

    • LOL no problem. I appreciate it. :)

    • There are always idiots who enjoy creating problems. Currently some are trying to cause Misha Collins to be fired. I wouldn’t call them SN fans because no fan would do such a rude thing. The show with just Dean and Sam would be boring. The interaction of others is why the show is fun because it opens up all kinds of possibilities.

    • @brenda2007 You know I really really want to know how you got this in the wrong way? How after reading it, you couldn’t tell it was clearly a joke. And you had to chat with your friends to realize it was a joke? Really?????? (and I know a few days ago people had being bashing Jared), but still, How? HOW/
      It’s just I can’t understand!

      and to the author: Hilarious!

    • @brenda2007 You know! I really really want to know how you got this post in the wrong way? How after reading it, you couldn’t tell it was clearly a joke. And you had to chat with your friends to realize it was a joke? Really?????? (and I know a few days ago people had being bashing Jared), but still, How? HOW?
      It’s just I can’t understand!, when I was reading it I was LOLOLOLOL
      and then reading a few comments and see that people think this is serious?
      really I can’t understand.

      And to the author: Hilarious!

  39. Well definitely the 1st season and if you think baby brother is bad don’t look at big brother and for heavens sakes don’t look at Daddy Winchester!! Whatever you do! Only the strongest hearts can take that level of perfection! WEG!!

    • LOL my fiancee firmly agrees with you. She thinks all the Winchester men are pretty sizzling, she just has a special place (I don’t think I need to know where) for the baby Winchester. :)

      • Personally for me it’s Poppa. Baby Win is cute but for me it’s John then Dean then Sam. I will admit it was good during the Hell House towel scene when he had his 1st shirtless scene I wasn’t drinking or eating. Blowing soda out of my nose from choking so hard wasn’t easy the 1st time! Who would of thunk skinny boy in too large clothes was hiding that! JDM I remember from Burning Zone (1996) and recognized him in the pilot but the way Kripke introduced him….is it hot or is it just me? Give Dean a few decades and he’ll be as hot as dad. Lord help us females then! It’s hard for this poor old 45 yr old not to drool even if drooling over the boys makes me feel like I’m robbing the cradle WEG!!

  40. PS it’s good for both members in a couple to have a rich fantasy life to off set the blah of day to day which can get routine and boring. You don’t even have to get weird/kinky to spice things up which after years of marriage have been know to happen even in the best of marriages. Trust is the best in a marriage. Not trusting hubby can cause the very thing you dread. Loss of hubby. As I said once, “Dude chicks hate needy guys.” Off course I said it to our dog barking and trying to get at a female dog. BTW Dude was never in my volcabulary until I started watching Supernatural. So we all have reasons to complain ;)

    • LOL I appreciate the advice. My fiancee and I are lucky that neither of us are especially jealous people, and we respect and trust each other. My fiancee was the one who had to tell me that it was okay to say that another woman is hot or attractive. She’s the one that I’m going home with. I hope your dog learns a lesson or two about neediness. Best Wishes! :)

      • Smart girl! Definitely a sign she’s secure not only in herself but in your relationship and proof she’s mature enough to really make a go of it. Remember though as Tom Baker said in Doctor Who “What’s the point of being grown up if you can’t be a child every so often.” Trust is no. 1 fun is no. 2. I’ve been married for 27 years and 6 kids so it’s hard but we do our best to remember the fun. To take time and breathe especially since once the kids start you don’t get many chances to breath as your busy circling the wagons to protect you from the kids and try to keep your sanity! LOL

  41. instead of hate others and waste much time on net to run a blog and say all kinds of craps to someone you dont know, try to learn how to satisfy your girl in bed, she will be yours afterward.
    and one more thing, for the love of god have some confidence, and dont cry like a school girl. BE A MAN IN LIFE and specially in your case be good in bed.
    i’m out

    • Mike, you’re a troll. Either that, you’re an idiot for not getting the joke.

    • Apparently my comic timing is failing me. I assure you that I bear no animosity toward Padalecki whatsoever, and I would never seriously suggest that he is anything other than an awesome person. My blog (of which it is debatable that I don’t spend enough time working on) is simply a hobby and something that helps me to keep my writing skills sharp (I am a freelance writer). The article was meant purely in the spirit of comedy and entertainment, and if I came across otherwise, the fault is mine and I apologize. I’m not sure how my bedroom skills came into question, but–besides being none of anyone’s business–I can assure you that they are adequate. If you need pointers, feel free to ask. We are all here to help you. Thank you for your concern. :)

      • Not really just some people are particularly dense. Amongst the Sam fans there are some who see Sam and Jared as a saint, perfect, never make mistakes and they abuse anybody they feel trashed their god. The law calls people who can’t tell reality from fantasy to the point where they become abusive and perhaps violent as stalkers. People in need of therapy and locked wards.

    • I’m going to take a WILD guess that you don’t have a girlfriend or fiance or wife or even female friend. Because if you think you’ll get to “own” a girl and that all you need to do for her to remain “yours” is be good in bed? You are so beyond delusional. That or I feel really, really, REALLY sorry for any females that happen to be in your life. Don’t transfer onto others the fact that YOU only think about sex.

      To the author of the post: with that sense of humor and sarcastic wit, I doubt you’re at any risk of your fiance dumping you, chiseled abs or not ;D

  42. “This guy’s groin has its own six-pack!” This line alone has had me giggling at inappropriate moments for the last 24 hours. Great writing and I loving every minute of it. Looking through the comments though, it must be hard dealing with people who have no sense of humor. Keep going and thanks again.

  43. LOL..you’re awesome. Jared Padalecki is really beautiful inside & out.
    Supernatural fans, seriously? You’re not that stupid..come on.

    Wait a minute..is it just me or are some people here so angry because he did not write about Jensen Ackles?.LOL

    • No most take it as offered the only abusive ones are the ones unable to understand the word humor. Tongue in cheek play on a stereotype.

  44. This was hilarious. Ignore the haters who don’t have a sense of humor. And sorry Dude, but don’t try and live up to Jared. Not only is he awesomely goodlooking, sexy as hell and a good actor, but he loves animals, gives to charity, adores his family and has a great sense of humor. Nobody can live up to that, but don’t despair. I’m in your fiance’s boat and I still think my husband is pretty awesome too. There’s room in her heart for both of you.

    • LOL I agree that he’s an awesome guy. I am, in fact, prepared to nominate him as the next incarnation of the Buddha. Thankfully, you are correct and despite my many imperfections, my fiancee is crazy about me. I can only assume that she is literally crazy, but I’m okay with taking advantage of her insanity. I wish you and your husband all of the wonderful things in life. Thank you for reading, and I hope you come back again. :)

  45. Jackie L. Vester

    I thought this was hillarious and I’m a total Jared girl. I’m sure that he would find it absolutely hysterical. I’m so sorry for the people that took it the wrong way. I totally get what you’re saying. My husband already gave me a “free pass” with Jared if he ever comes to our house to ask me out on my imaginary date

  46. LOL I actually gave my fiancee a “free pass” with Jared too. I’m glad you enjoyed. Thanks for reading, and I hope you come back again! :)

  47. At first I was like ‘you f’ing WHAT…’!!! And then preceded to laugh my bits off. Groin 6 pack….ummm groin 6 pack *cough* *ahem* you lost me there for a second lol! Anyone who did ‘get’ this should be ridiculed!

  48. Bonnie Perkins

    Any chance you could convince my BF to let me have my poster of the boys? Lol. He complains I have my picture of Me and Jensen from one of the Cons out on the shelf. Regardless, absolutely hilarious.. ignore the haters! JARED would laugh is butt off at this!! Totally made my day after such a crappy one! Thanks! OH, and wtg on being so awesome!!

    • LOL sure, tell him to shoot me an email and I’ll try to reason with him. And don’t worry too much about the Con pic. Every guy just has to come to terms with the fact that their significant other is going to appreciate other hot guys from time to time. You still have room in your life for both him and the Winchester boys. But I’m glad I made your day better. That’s the highest praise that a writer can hope for. Thanks for reading! :)

  49. vicky_velocity1982

    Oh, Douglas, this was the most awesome thing ever! I’m still LOLing over it. Bravo, sir, bravo! Your fiancee is a lucky woman. (Too bad that some of the respondents here have such stunted senses of humor — just let those humorless biddies stew in their own sour juices.)

  50. I do hope you saw this ;)

  51. Jared just tweeted about you. Jared Padalecki‏@jarpad

    To “Douglas W. Pope”: Thanks for a good laugh, I was just sent your “rant” & it made me laugh. Yes, out loud. So, you lol’d me. Well done

  52. You sir, are a wordsmithing genius! This is without a doubt my absolute favourite blog posting EVER! Reading it was truly a laugh out loud experience. “Buying Supernatural for a woman is spiritually akin to buying her pornography–but with better looking actors.” You’re probably not far from the truth, Doug. But cut yourself some slack…Jared/Sam is not perfect…he did drink demon blood, ditch his brother for a demon chick, start the apocalypse AND grow some verging on offensive side burns. See? You’re one up on him already! Now Jensen/Dean? Well, for those of us that are Team Dean, that’s another can of worms altogether :)

    • eclecticink2y5

      Thank you , Wendy, for pointing out the sideburns. Here’s hoping they disappear for season 8. And yes, as a Team Dean member, I couldn’t agree with you more.

    • LOL…you mad? or jealous? This is not about to please teams….It’s About Jared Padalecki. Jared is his favorite actor in the show. Get over it..

  53. “On the evening that his child was conceived, there was a disturbance in the Force!”
    -That was the best line I’ve heard! Although, I’m a Jensen girl, I can definitely appreciate that man. I don’t get intimidated easily but when I walked up to Jared Padalecki for a picture, I stopped speaking. Literally. Give me a regular Joe everyday but I’ll have him for the weekends. :)

  54. Lost In Tardis

    So funny that Jared has now read this post and tweeted about it! At least he saw the humour in it – even while a lot of people here didn’t… would be nice if those that gave you grief apologise to you for lacking the ability to LOL like Jared! Now you just need to ‘hate’ Jensen for being ridiculously fabulous! *larf*

  55. Sorry can’t feel very sorry for the male race when this has been happening to females for decades. He is what woman have always told men is the perfect man, smart, handsome, and a very kind person.

  56. I didn’t want that last comment to come off as sounding bitter, I am not, but literally, Jared is the perfect guy.

  57. OMG this is so funny!! I am glad Jared replied to you! and really fans take it lightly. We should laugh sometimes. And as someone who has the honored of meeting Jared he is perfect lol!

  58. Loved this article so much! Found it because Jared commented on it on Twitter and then Winchester Brothers linked it. Get ready for a lot of comments I’m sure!. I am a Jensen girl, but love Jared as well. He is everything a girl could want. Have you taken your girlfriend to a Supernatural convention? If not, you need to. She’ll love him even more (and you’ll hate him even more of course) if she meets him in person. He is awesome! BTW, I am married and have a Jensen/Jared poster hanging in my closet like a 12 year old and an autographed picture of the two of them on my dresser so I can look at them everyday and my husband is cool with it!

  59. Julie MackeNzie

    LOL! I bookmarked it! I despise Beyonce’ for the same reasons. Thanks for the giggle!

  60. Now Jared know about this too! Congratulations! :D

  61. Too funny :D Loved it!

  62. Seriously funny article. Fuck people who take this too seriously. Its funny you morons, get your head out of the fan fiction and take a joke. I have a great imaginary affair with Sam Winchester, I would like a man who gives me the DVD for a gift any day!

  63. I’ve been a fan of both Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles for years and I absolutely loved this article. I’ve read it quite a few times because I couldn’t stop laughing. Brilliant little rant you have here and now that you actually have Jared’s attention, (as noted earlier and on his Twitter handle @jarpad), I hope everyone who reads this will appreciate it for the genius it is. :)

  64. Whatever! acklesepic.com is more amusing than this!

  65. Oh, that’s just TOO funny!! You’re girlfriend obviously has fine taste in men (and television shows!!!) and you’re a sweetheart for sharing that with her. (That counts, you know!!) As another person commented, even Jared tweeted that he literally LOL’d at the article (you forgot to mention he has an awesome sense of humor!!) so anyone who’s taking this seriously seriously needs to lighten up.

  66. I forwarded the link to Padalecki telling him he needed to check it out figuring if he responded with good vibes mayhaps those abusing would knock it off. Can’t smack you around if the guy they’re defending liked it himself. Glad to see it seemed to be working. Folks JP’s a big boy and more then capable of fighting his own battles. Unless he says different please chill on the nasty stuff and don’t post about the authors body, treatment of fiancee and sex life because even if you know him it’s none of your biz not to mention when JP’s fans react classless it reflects badly on him.

    • Tricia Raines

      Can I hear an Amen?! Have as much class and poise as Jared himself, folks, and for God’s sake, get a clue about humor and hyperbole!

    • He already seen it seeing as he tweeted about it yesterday.

      • I know. My post is stating I’m the reason he knows. I sent it days ago on 6/2 and Jared twiitted 6/8. I didn’t mean I’d just sent it.

  67. *laughs* This is wonderful. You made Jared laugh and me because it’s true and I’ve meet the man in person more than once. He’s a tall drink of water with an amazing heart. He could make us all fall for him in 5 seconds ;)

    Sorry that some people took this so seriously. Apparently they can’t ready or don’t have any kind of sense of humor.

  68. Very funny article! Jared Padalecki is indeed a beautiful, beautiful man! Though that photoshopped picture is probably someone else’s body, ha ha. Glad to hear you like his acting on the show, as I do too. He has some serious chops that I think could be used on the show even better. Jared would make fine casting for a super hero or an elf of some kind. For me, Jared has the best smile and the best laugh on the planet.

  69. Hey there! Just wanted to say how much I loved and laughed at your “rant”. Jared Padalecki is probably one of the funniest guys on the planet, too, and you already know HE loved it. Sorry some of the others ~seriously~ lack a sense of humor. Congratulations and may you and your fiancee have many happy years together. :)

  70. This…is awesome. Completely loved it, and to quote Jared “You lol’d me.” My eyes actually teared up a little from laughing. The fact that it’s well written is a major plus. As a Sam/Jared fan, this completely made my night. And as a female, I have to agree, he is a beautiful, beautiful man. Those who got defensive need to take a step back and remember a little thing called context and employ their sense of humor.

  71. I love a straight guy who can suck a celebrities E-Penis in a manly way. It is hot! Dude, well played and bask in the attention. Sucking famous cock online is a hard skill to master! Good laughs! Funny.

  72. I LOVE this! So true!

  73. Enjoyed your article immensely. Consider another point of view on the Padalecki perfection though – as a parent. My lovely and 15 year old daughter is now safe from any lame 15 or 16 year old boy who couldn’t possibly compare to Sam Winchester. She’s happy to study hard and go out with big groups of friends or stay home with me curled up on the couch watching Supernatural. Hopefully by the time she is in her mid 20′s – and Jared is pushing 40 – she will come to realize that a sweet, funny guy who would buy his girlfriend a Supernatural DVD and then blog about it is the real hero!

    • lol your comment wins! jared padalecki/sam winchester: keeping teenage girls safe from stupid teenaged boys since 2005 ;D

  74. Fantastic piece dude. I laughed so hard. Was sent the link after Jared’s tweet. The tone is great. I’ve seriously read this like 5 times now. Can not get through it with a straight face. Perhaps this should be shown to all future male spouses of female fans as a point of reference lol. Made my day.

  75. Unreservedly exquisite! Gave me quiet the laugh with a little side order of tears of joy. I appreciate the fact that we have absolutely BRILLIANT actors out there; like Jared Padalecki. It’s true, he is perfect in every known aspect, (well not EVERY one as another commenter said about him taking a sh#t and picking his nose) and Gen is extremely luck to have him. But we ladies aren’t always after perfection. Personality matters too, and as far as I know, Jared is a swell guy!

    Nevertheless, I, without question, love Jared Padalecki :D Looking forward to seeing him as perfect as ever in the 8th season. <3

  76. just read your rant about Jared. so very funny!!! Thanks so much for the laugh, and if your wife hasn’t met him in person…he is just as great as he is on Supernatural!

  77. Dude – you are a dude, right – I think you’re the one hot for Padalecki. If you’re fiance is a girl, you might want to rethink things. Just a suggestion.

  78. loved it, just made my day after a hard day at work….you sir are a blessing to this tired soul…thanks for a hardy laugh…..sorry for the mean comments, some people can’t get a joke.

  79. Awesome!! I have to say I love a guy with flaws, so I tend to lean towards Jensen’s character Dean, rather than Jared’s portrayal of Sam (who is a bit too goody two shoes for me). I agree that people take these kind of things too seriously and should lighten up ;)

    • I think Sam comes across as a goody-two-shoes the same way Dean comes across as arrogant and self-righteous. It’s part of their character because of how their lives have been. Sam has a boner for saving people because he couldn’t save anyone, even himself and Dean is self-righteous because he never had a normal life. It’s his defense mechanism. Probably my favorite things about them. It’s things like this that make their characters so real and conversely anger me because this show is actually really effing brilliant and deserves so much praise. Ugh.

      • Tricia Raines

        =) Technically, Michelle, Sam and Dean have each had the same amount of “normal life”: Dean, for the first 4 years of his life, while their mother was still living; and Sam, the 4 years he went away to college! Both are flawed in their own ways, and yet still incredibly heroic. I love Dean’s sardonic humor, and Sam’s soulfulness and intelligence. You are absolutely correct as to the brilliance of the show…not only in it’s performers; but also in it’s writers, special effects, camera-work and creator. I have gone a long time with no television (since 2004), but when my friend turned me on to the series via DVD, I have made sure that I am at a friend’s house watching on every Supernatural night! One of the few worth watching!

      • Dean self righteous? HUH? self righteous is defined as is a feeling of (usually) smug moral superiority[2] derived from a sense that one’s beliefs, actions, or affiliations are of greater virtue than those of the average person. Dean is nothing like that.

        • please, dean may not be SELF-righteous but he’s definitely righteous. his sense of justice and morality is the only one he blindly sees and follows and expects everyone else to follow too. that’s one of the things that frustrates me in him and therefore one of the things i love about him as a character. like sam’s tendency for blind means-to-an-end reasoning is one of the flaws i love in sam. i love their flaws just as i love their qualities. their flaws are what makes them FUN and interesting heroes. perfect heroes are boooooooooring.

          • Wow, NOT! Dean’s not like that at all. He does have a sense of justice and morality but he doesn’t follow it blindly. Dean’s always shown a willingness to go with the best idea from the people he trusts, sometimes he needs to be convinced, which is not a bad thing, he’d be stupid if he just blindly listened to other people – that includes Sam, Bobby or Castiel or his late father John. He’s the one person who has virtually never allowed his ego or pride get in the way of getting the job done. And it fits his character too, his sense of self-worth has always been in the toilet – so naturally it would make him more likely to think “Maybe someone else might have a better idea”. Actually Dean’s generally gotten into more trouble when he’s given in to those he cares about than when he’s followed his own gut. Just because he sometimes follows his own instincts(which is by no means a bad thing as his “gut instinct” has been shown to be excellent and better than Sam, Bobby, Castiel or his late father John’s–they all have their own strengths, well Dean’s gut instinct is one of the very few he’s been allowed consistently) doesn’t mean he’s blind.

            Dean’s not perfect but it would be nice if people didn’t give him imperfections he doesn’t actually have.

            • TA! Sam’s the self righteous one. “I don’t understand the faith you have in the man.” he says to Dean. It’s not Sam’s business what faith Dean does or doesn’t have in John & he has no right trashing Dean for it. Dean is Always dragging Sam out of crap Sam got himself into and then Sam proceeds to chastise Dean as if Dean were a child and Sam were the parent. Sam kills Emma and then excuses his actions with “It’s not like she was yours.” Then why did Lydia sleep with Dean to get preggers? Yes Emma was his biological daughter Sam. The amazon dna may of taken over but the young amazons wouldn’t need to kill their dad’s to prove their loyalty if the guys like Dean didn’t provide dna. The bit where Sam dismissed Dean’s pain over losing Mary because it was 20 odd years ago compared to the 6 months he’d mourned Jess made me want to smack him. A grown adult handles emotions better then a 4 yr old because they’re more experienced so regardless of the time dismissing Dean’s pain over Mary’s death was just rude. A loved ones death isn’t gotten over just learn to live with it. 4 yr olds don’t know they have emotions let alone know how to use them and Mary’s death scarred Dean far worse then Jess did Sam.

              • just an observation: dna and “blood” mean crap when it comes to parenting and family. dean may have been the sperm donor but he never planned to conceive the girl and he was never her parent. sam killed the little monster child (before she tried to kill dean again) because he knew dean couldn’t do it. just like dean killed sam’s friend (when he didn’t trust sam’s judgment) because he knew sam couldn’t do it. and then he HID it and lied about it. stop being melodramatic as if sam killed dean’s child just to be mean. but, ok, ok, dean’s the perfect brother. sam is the horrible one. dean’s the hero, sam’s the cruel jack**s who only exists to hurt him. i’m stepping away from this now. wow, SO not watching the same show as you people. sorry, douglas, that your post has turned into yet another foolish “let’s bash sam” fight.

                • dnanot equaling parent too true but to be fair Dean never got the chance. Also Emma for all her protests seemed to be taking her time killing him perhaps because Dean was swaying her. As to Sam killing Emma then bringing up Amy what do you call it. Emma had a short sword and couldn’t reach either brother befpre she would of been shot dead. Her sword was at her side in no way making a threatening lives in danger move and yet Sam shot her. As for Dean not being able to kill Emma if needed apparently we’ve been watching different shows because the Dean I know would hurt but he’d do what was needed. BTW I never said Dean was perfect and Sam slime. I said Sam wasn’t the saint the poster made him out to be. I never bashed Sam but made a post saying Sam wasn’t as pure as the driven snow either. It was in no way a let’s bash Sam. Just a statement of facts. Perfection is boring and as the author of the Supernatural myth book said we love the Winchesters because of their flaws.

                  • i wasn’t saying it was fair to dean that he didn’t get to be there for emma, that was totally lydia’s fault. i’m just saying it’s not fair to label sam the bad guy for killing her when dean did the exact same thing to amy while lying to sam’s face about it. you say emma wasn’t threatening to them at the moment. amy wasn’t either. in fact, she wasn’t armed, she didn’t even get to put up a fight either. unlike emma, she was not hellbent on harming either one of them. it proves to me that dean’s just as righteous as i said he was in my previous comment. and a hypocrite too. and it shows he’s just as capable of lying to sam as sam is capable of lying to him. not a single comment in this thread has painted sam as a saint for you to keep harping on all of sam’s faults. the initial commenter you replied to, in fact, talked about BOTH of them being flawed. your comments in this thread have all been about defending dean at all costs and twisting facts to make sam guilty of every bad thing.

                    • There however was a difference Amy was a mother who swore after murdering 5 men with an ice pick like weapon which BTW is small and not easily noted she wouldn’t do it again to a man whose mother destroyed herself to protect her kids and whose father gave himself up to hell literally to protect his boys so Dean knew she’d kill again if Isaac needed her to. Emma was 16, never killed and didn’t deny why she was there after the initial daddy help me bit and seemed to be taking her time getting around to the killing of her dad. I never stated Sam was a villian and I never twisted any facts. Go back and watch the eps in question without bias and then tell me how I twisted anything.

                    • amy was a mother who killed scumbags no one would give a crap about because of her kid. saying emma was taking her time to getting around to killing dean does not in any way diminish the fact that she was there to do so. regardless, dean saw a threat and eliminated it. sam saw a threat and eliminated it. i don’t see a single difference in that, except for how dean lied about it. except for how dean wanted to give a chance to a supernatural kid just because his sperm was unwillingly involved but he wouldn’t give a chance to amy just because she didn’t fall into the category of “acceptable supernatural beings according to dean winchester.”

                    • and then sam is painted as the bad guy for killing dean’s kid, when dean did the same to his friend. their reasoning was exactly the same. painting one as having a valid reason and the other as having an invalid one when they both used the same reason to eliminate a supernatural threat is just plain unfair.

            • you think it would be nice if people didn’t give dean imperfections he doesn’t actually have. i wish dean fans would stop wiping off his main flaw because it doesn’t fall in line with their own ideal of what a flawed hero has to be. “because i said so”, “because i’m the oldest”, “we’re doing it my way”. just a few of the righteous things i remember dean saying off the top of my head. also, i’m not just talking about decision-making. i’m talking about his attitude toward people too. anyone who doesn’t live by his own code of conduct gets judged badly. he got sam away from the life sam was making for himself because he thought HIS values (hunting, “family”) were bigger than sam’s, because HE didn’t want to do it alone, to hell with what sam wanted. because what sam wanted couldn’t POSSIBLY be the best for sam. he KNEW the weight his decision to sell his soul would have on sam and yet he went ahead and did it anyway, because HE couldn’t deal with life without sam, to hell with what sam would feel like. but whatever, just the fact that you say dean hasn’t followed john blindly already proves to me that we’re SO obviously not watching the same show. this teaches me to step away from my small circle of sane bi-bro fans.

              • When did Dean say doing it my way or because I said so. As for the eldest he said it oncPlaythings is nowhere near as bad as betraying trust. With Ruby it was demon blood but why not tell his brother his suspicions of Cas? Why not tell Dean about being soul less?

                • yeah, not going to look for the quotes for you, sorry. i remember them, you don’t, whatever. why not tell dean about his suspicions of castiel? because dean wouldn’t listen. dean was hellbent on trusting castiel more than trusting sam for quite a while there. sam betraying dean’s trust was bad, yes, but dean lying about trusting sam again was just as bad imo. why not tell dean about being soulless? you’re kidding, right? HE WAS SOULLESS! he was driven by instinct and survival is an instinct. of COURSE he wouldn’t tell dean something like that when it meant that it would make things more difficult for him. i’m far from saying sam’s perfect, he’s got the most annoying martyr complex ever, he is really, really bad at measuring the possible side effects of his actions whenever he’s reaching for a goal, however noble that goal might be. but let’s not resort to blaming sam for the things he did while he didn’t have a soul, shall we?

                  • I do and as for Dean trusting Cas more then Sam. WHAT?! Everything Dean has done has put Sam first. He defended Cas to Sam and Bobby because of the history they have where Cas has rebelled against heaven to protect not just Dean but Sam as well. I remember Cas telling Anna to leave Sam alone because Sam was his friend. Dean didn’t rush off and tattle on Sam and Bobby but he didn’t just accept their doubts without evidence either.

                • Sam: But Dean… I mean, if we’re gonna ice the devil…
                  Dean: This is what we’re doing. End of discussion.

                  Sam: I’m not so sure this thing is over.
                  Dean: It was a ghost. It was a weirdly super charged fruitarian ghost, but it was still a ghost. Now, let’s go.
                  Sam: So first you drag me into town and now you drag me back out?
                  Dean: You ain’t steering this boat. Let’s go, chop chop.

                  This was season five, so I’m not saying Dean didn’t have a valid reason to be upset with Sam, but he was still being very stubborn about not listening to Sam even when Sam had good points.

        • Your preference is showing, Tawrens. Favoritism prevents logical thought. Dean’s really only self-righteous when it comes to Sam. I think that’s what Michelle meant. But like PG said below, Dean is very righteous. It is perhaps his biggest flaw. He thinks something and that’s gospel to him. Even Sam has to work to sway him. It’s his way or the highway on most things. And that’s a character flaw the writers have worked beautifully. Remember when Dean called Sam a bitch early in season 7? He didn’t account for the very valid reasons Sam felt the way he did. As we later saw, Dean’s reactions fueled (just as they always have) Sam’s apology in the episode. Another case of Sam sacrificing his own feelings to appease someone else – this time, Dean’s. Logically, nobody can say that Sam was being a bitch after everything he went through. Normal people would be balled up in a corner somewhere, rocking back and forth. But that’s the dynamic that the show created. Dean is an arrogant, shoot first, ask questions later guy who is the way he is because of intense love for Sam. Sam is a self-appointed martyr for the purest but most unhealthy reasons and very much the hero of the show.

          • You’re wrong. Remember Lenore? Remember how Dean adjusted his actions with the demon disease due to Sam’s influence allowing a demon to get away? Dean has worked with Ruby because Sam said to despite his concern about her being a demon yet Sam has concerns about Cas and keeps his brother out of the loop. Dean is the one who sacrifices for Sam. Remember something Wicked Sam moaned about his and Michael’s lost innocence and instead of Dean bemoaning his lost innocence he wished Sam’s innocence back. Shadow Dean wants his family together and Sam is only interested in avenging Jess. When Dean &Sam return to the past Sam moans how he forgives John for what John’s hunting did to them. What did it do? Kept Sam alive and not ending up being Lucifer’s condom. In Faith Dean’s dying yet he let’s Sam drag him to LaGrange. Yet in Born Sam is dying and he tells Dean just forget it and let Sam die. He obviously doesn’t know the man who sold himself to hell for Sam if he thinks Dean will give up that easily especially where Sam’s concerned. Sam’s matured some since season 1 but he can still be a brat. BTW I’m a John girl not a Dean girl.

            • right. you may not be a dean girl but, just so you know, you come across as a rabidly anti-sam girl, no matter which “team” you’re on.

              • How does saying both boys are flawed is anti Sam? I was responding to an anti Dean post and all of a sudden I hate an imaginary character without reason. I’m anti rabid Sam fan girl who as pq said Sam can’t be blamed for not telling Dean about his absent soul. Why not? Sam knows Dean was willing to spend eternity in hell for him but he can’t trust telling his brother about his soul lessness? I have a problem with a section of Sam fans who are constantly stating Sam can do no wrong but everyone else is lame. They bash anyone and everything regardless of reality. If I knew everything I said would be taken as a personal attack on Sam I wouldn’t of bothered to post. It’s these saint Sam girls who are behind trying to get Misha Collins fired because god forbid Dean love anyone but Sam. My problem is with the bias opinion some Sam fans seem to have.

                • i have no idea what you’re even talking about regarding misha. i’m not painting sam as a saint. i wasn’t the one who even brought sam’s faults into discussion. i love both brothers, i think they’re both deliciously dysfunctional. but sam gets slammed for his stupid actions (of which there have indeed been many) and he gets slammed even when it’s not his fault. if dean had been the one to lose his soul, all of you blaming sam for his actions and evasions would defend dean. sam. had. no. soul. therefore. he. had. no. empathy. he was essentially, as per show canon, a psychopath. research it a little. a psychopath would NEVER, EVER expose a weakness like sam telling dean he had no soul. dean had said before that, if he didn’t know sam, he would want to hunt him. and that was when sam had a soul and was fully himself. what’s to stop dean from hunting him now that he’s not fully sam? y’know what, i’m done with this discussion. i should have known better than to try talking about dean being flawed. of course i would get an avalanche of how sam sucks more.

                  • No difference between a girl Sam knew about an hour and is notable for his 1st kiss and only killing her mom because she had no choice compared to his niece? As for defending Dean if he lost his soul. No. I wouldn’t defend Dean if he did the same as Sam during the loss of soul. However Sam lost his soul and figured the ends justify the means. Dean lost his humanity when he became a vamp yet didn’t munch on Sam, Bobby and even restrained himself from munching on Lisa and Ben. He even with the alpha vamp whispering in his ear managed to retain enough of his humanity to use his new abilities to kill the nest including the vamp that turned him. 1 side says Sam’s perfect and the other side says Dean suffers because Sera is in love with Sam. Of the two the saint Sam squad is worse because they can get very rude compared to any other fan grouping I’ve come in contact with.

                • I don’t think this was ever an anti Dean post. People were just pointing out the flaws that they were seeing in both boys. Also, I didn’t see you saying that we both flawed, all you’ve been doing is listing everything that you see wrong in Sam.

                  I don’t think Sam actually knew that he didn’t have a soul when he was soulless until Castiel told them. He just knew that something was different.

    • Woa guys…slow down. Why the serious fight about Sam & Dean here? Apart from the fact that those two are just TV character & the fact that the comment section is suppose to be about the post… Look, both characters evolves. Both characters are different yet in some ways the same. Both characters love each other (as bro, don’t get your wincest mind hyper) & would die for each other. In the end, its still Sam & Dean.

  80. LOL, This a funny post! Thanks for making me laugh!

    Yeah, He is gorgeous just like a male angel should be, like his co-stars Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins. Any boyfriend would be jealous of them.

    Jared Padalecki also laugh about it!

    Jared Padalecki ‏@jarpad ‘ To “Douglas W. Pope”: Thanks for a good laugh, I was just sent your “rant” & it made me laugh. Yes, out loud. So, you lol’d me. Well done’

  81. You’re so funny, thanks

  82. Hysterical. And I think you’re very sweet to respond nicely even to those who are silly enough to think you were serious. Your wife is a lucky woman. (I’m lucky too, I’ve got a great one and he likes Supernatural too. Lol)

  83. Tricia Raines

    I would defend Jared Padelecki and Sam Winchester with guns, knives and, YES, hand-to-hand combat if I didn’t get this article’s humorous intent! You, sir, have a rapier wit, and are to be commended for it! Particularly humorous “This guy’s groin has it’s own six pack.” Well-written, well-ranted, and well-received! Thanks for making me shoot Diet Coke with Lime out of my nose! (NOT the most comfortable of experiences!)

  84. You and my husband would enjoy having a beer together — while your fiance and I drooled together over our favorite sexy man. It’s not just the abs, or the groin abs, it’s the puppy dog eyes, and take it from a married woman also in love with Jared, your attempt at those puppy dog eyes will never be as successful. However, post-Supernatural watching relations are worth it. Worth. it.

  85. LOL…nice one! Is it weird that I’m a big fan of Jensen & wanna see “I Hate You, Jensen Ackles” version? Haha!!!
    P.S. The way you respond to negative comments really impress me, Bravo!!!

  86. Reblogged this on spn411 and commented:
    This is HILARIOUS!! A MUST READ FOR ANY SUPERNATURAL FAN!! I got such a kick out of it!! :)

  87. I found this very entertaining and could image my husband writing it just substituting Jensen Ackles for Jared, since I’m a die-hard DeanGirl, but the thought is the same. My poor put-upon husband was actually dragged to a SPN Con last year and will be again this year, luckily he does enjoy watching the show, not however with my level my drooling appreciation.

    What I found amazing is how many people here are so dim as to think this was written as a serious rant, reading comprehension was obviously not one of their better subjects.

  88. I feel that this article can also be applied to chocolate cake…
    Mmm… cake…

  89. Thank you for this laugh :) Best wishes for you and your fiance.

  90. This was really funny! thanks for the good laugh!And since even Jared took is as a joke(as it is) the people who are giving you a hard time should really grow a sense of humor!And good for you for the way you handle them! :)

  91. It doesn’t look like anyone else has mentioned this, but Jared tweeted about your article last night!

    Jared Padalecki
    To “Douglas W. Pope”:
    Thanks for a good laugh, I was just sent your “rant” & it made me laugh. Yes, out loud. So, you lol’d me. Well done.

  92. It doesn’t look like anyone else has let you know… Jared tweeted about this last night!

    Jared Padalecki
    To “Douglas W. Pope”:
    Thanks for a good laugh, I was just sent your “rant” & it made me laugh. Yes, out loud. So, you lol’d me. Well done.

  93. I do want to let you know, I never meant anything mean towards you, I laughed so hard each time I read this article, I even laughed while walking my dog and remembering the six pack line. You are extremely talented as a writer, you would make a great journalist. I love depreciating humor as I use it myself quite a lot, thank you very much for this.

  94. chantalclaire

    Hilarious!!! Great way to start my day. LOL

  95. I had to immediately share this article with my husband, who has a habit of stating that he would like to slam exceptionally pretty men’s heads in car doors. (Legolas, for example, prompts an almost immediate state of rage upon the first wisps of his platinum hair upon the screen.) He guffawed heartily, and I mentioned that the two of you should probably get together and start a reign of car-door-slamming terror. His rueful response: “Yes, but it would probably take about six of us to hold the guy down.”

    Sigh. My husband is awesome. As are you. Thanks for the giggles.

  96. eclecticink2y5

    This is such a wonderful thing! Your writing is flawless (except, of course, for your criticisms of Jared lol), and your humor is impeccable. Thanks for a good laugh this morning. Also, I love your analysis of Sam’s personality – I never realized how ludicrously “good” that guy is. He is, in fact, a saint. And yet they still manage to make him dark . . . You have to admit, “porn” or not, it’s a great show XD

  97. god, some people posting on this have NO SENSE OF HUMOR WHATSOEVER. Great faux rant, Douglas. Very funny and clever. Thanks for the laugh.

  98. Well, jared is a great actor and have a big heart. He’s beautiful too, but that’s not everything. Beauty not is important. Not for me. Jared is my inspiration, i’m a big fan of him. And if you think so, i can’t do anything. But I just want ask respect. Do you have a idol? Do you like haters? Haters of his idol? Nobody like! So, stop with that. Please.

  99. Laughing out loud here! haha jealousy mode on!

  100. LOL XD That was a hilarious read. Jared really is something else. Thanks for the laugh, you seem like a great guy.

  101. Ummm…..I hope you’re ready for the deluge of Supernatural fans about to come your way since Jared announced on his Twitter that your blog made him laugh. :-) Great piece by the way, and my husband agrees.

  102. JaredsPornGirlNot

    Wow, can’t believe how many fans don’t know how clearly interpret what they’re reading. The beginning of his article makes that clear the author has no malicious intent. It’s meant to be funny, which it is, in spades! LMAO, LOL, and ROFL– I did all of these (well, I figuratively rolled on the floor laughing, not literally cause that’s just weird) while reading this, Mr. Pope! :) Loved it!
    Oh, and if it makes you feel better Doug, the only thing real in that photo of Jared are his face and wings. Tee Hee! :P

  103. The funny bone-not everyone is born with one. Apparently. It was clear it was humor from the jump. Either they enjoy creating drama or they are too stupid to get jokes. I found this funny and I’m not a Jared P fan myself. It could apply to almost any couple where the wife has a crush on a hot celebrity. My taste of choice is Alex O’Loughlin and my husband refers to him as “Oh ‘that’ guy…that’s her ‘boyfriend”

  104. I just can’t stop laughing.

  105. LOL Kudos to you Mr Douglas. I for one love what you wrote and am a die hard fan of Supernatural and love both boys :) Although I consider myself a “Dean” girl. You did an awesome job and for those that are being negative, they need even an ounce of humor :p I have added you and look forward to reading more from you. You have quite the talent. Congrats on a job well done :)

  106. Oh man, I laughed so hard! This was excellent! Totally made my day. Thanks for sharing! :D

  107. Supernatural’s a pretty good show, I personally watch it mainly for the plot and character arcs. As an aspiring writer, I tend to value these things more than anything else. But yes, the hotness of the Winchester boys definitely puts a spice in my viewing (along with the angel goodness of Castiel, and the reoccurring girl-crush worthy appeal of Meg Masters)

  108. Sorry. I am not a fan of hard bodies and soft jaws. I like my men strong, but cushy enough to snuggle with without hurting myself.

  109. Janani Elrondsell

    I loved your article! It made me laugh out loud and walk about was exactly what i needed today (I have my Engineering Mathematics final on Tuesday).

    In my house, my 13 year old sis likes Jensen but doesn’t like Jared (no accounting for taste) and mom prefers him as well. But anytime sis mentions something Jensen is better at, mom goes “They’re still people like everyone else. They have to sit on the toilet on the morning and throw up when sick. What is the point?”
    My granmother just says Castiel has “pretty blue eyes.”
    Dad just ignores the madness. I wish he had your sense of humour. It would be the icing on the cake whenever these “debates” happen.

  110. That was hilarious. I lol’d so hard.

  111. Nice piece of writing dude!! True.. The guy is truly godlike.
    Totally enjoyed reading it! LOL

  112. I also am a huge Supernatural fan of the “boys”, but what you said is so true. At the moment I don’t have a husband/boyfriend, but if I did, YES he would have problems with me loving Jared and Jensen. I know a lot of people feel the same way your girlfriend does, but you are real life and you sound really sweet. I think she’s a very luck girl to have found you. Your rant was very funny and the fact that Jared liked it made it even more cute. Good Luck.

  113. It seems like many people took the whole thing a bit too seriously. Anyway My husband empathizes with you.. Yeah in a way I too hate him for makiing my life miserable.. [sigh]

  114. this article is fantastic and hilarious…..i really love it<3

  115. I want to be a troll & pretend I have no sense of humor even after seeing a fat guy wearing a big golden cross and a small tight black underwear.

  116. I am a huge fan of Supernatural (I run a fan site) and an admirer of Mr. Padalecki as well… I am so jealous of his wife. That being said, I LOVE THIS! I read it while at work and literally laughed out loud and got evil stares. Those who are badmouthing this must not understand that it is meant to be funny. Whatever. Keep up the writing!!! :)

  117. Tricia Raines

    Dearest Douglas the Awesome- when you wrote this fabulous piece, did you have an idea what you were unleashing? Dean-girl/Sam-girl…I wish we could all just get along, since we all love the show. I’m with Cas: I don’t fight anymore, I just watch the bees. But thanks again for a wonderfully written piece!

  118. My final post on the subject I AM NOT a Dean girl or a Sam girl! I’m a John girl! There other characters & it is possible for a SN fan to prefer one of them and Still be a SN fan! As for bashing Sam I posted about this misconception before. A group in the Sam fans get outraged if anyone posts anything that doesn’t demonize everyone but Sam. ‘How dare he/she not worship Saint Sam who can do no wrong!’ I post an opinion and I’m a Dean girl bashing poor saint Sam despite the fact that I’ve repeatedly told them I’m a John fan. Just because I posted saying Sam is no more saintly then anyone else and GASP! a normal every day human being I’m bashing him and the arsenal must come out and defend him against horror of horrors me! Sam is a character. He is not real and does not need defending! JP is a big boy who can defend himself as I’ve said before and just by saying Sam’s not perfect is in no way insulting JP. I have no reason to bash either SW or JP I’m just stating a fact. This is as plain as I can put it. Stop taking what I say out of context and using it to demonize me because I prefer John to Sam.

  119. pq | June 12, 2012 at 2:29 am |

    amy was a mother who killed scumbags no one would give a crap about because of her kid. saying emma was taking her time to getting around to killing dean does not in any way diminish the fact that she was there to do so.

    I never said that Emma’s being there was a good thing. As for Amy’s scumbags their friends and family give a damn. Being a mother in no way absolves her of being a murderer and right there with aforementioned scumbags. Crime committed makes her a criminal regardless of her reasons. She could of gotten involved in any number of ways to save Isaac without murdering anyone. Gene therapy, hormone replacement therapy. Drugs that replace the pituary because it’s underactive. I’m sure there are treatments for those in need of regulating their pituary which is what the demon ate or ways of removing it without killing the victim. Her preceptions were they were scum but I know of people falsely accused murdered for being guilty of said crime only they weren’t and by the time the killer found out his victim was innocent it was too late. A young man accused of rape and has to file as a sex offender because at 21 he had sex with his 17 yr old girlfriend and said girlfriends parents not approving of their relationship charged him with statutory rape which states even if the sex was consenual the girl being underage was still raped by law.

  120. Poor Mr. Pope. I bet he had no idea what he was getting himself into.
    Please people – can we stop cluttering up this man’s blog with all this in depth character analysis? There are plenty of other sites for these kind of discussions.
    Again – thanks for a great original blog.

  121. I. Love. This. XD

  122. I hear you man! and this is coming from a lesbian also obsessed with this show! :D

  123. Was led here by the mangod himself. Good stuff! If only the actor behind the character wasn’t pretty darn funny himself, you’d have been able to one-up him on the comedy front. Oh well. Still good stuff ;-). Poster above the bed idea is brilliant too.

  124. Unfortunately, I have an even bigger problem – I want to be the creamy center of a Jared/Jensen Oreo. Those men are not from Earth – more like the planet “Sexpot.” I am married and love my husband to death, but HOLY GUACAMOLE! I have a complete fangurl picture of myself with Jared Padalecki (still trying for one with Jensen) and I’m a journalist who’s supposed to be objective when meeting celebrities. My grin is so big, I look like the Joker. But what could I do? Those two….eee-friggin’-gads.

  125. Nice blog post dude. :)
    I had to quit reading the responses about halfway down though, things just got too bizarre. Jared IS a cool guy btw, and so are you. :)

  126. Being a fan of the show, their Super attractiveness, (him and Jensen) is at times distracting. But you have to remember they are airbrushed, make-up’d, in good lighting and dressed by stylists. Although I do think that pic is his real chest. But don’t kid yourself, your wife’s affair includes Jensen too, their hotness multiplies exponentially when they stand next to each other. It’s a phenomenon, it’s Supernatural lol.

  127. Douglas it’s no wonder you feel that way!!! lol What man can compete with this!??!! lol
    https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150860178741044&set=a.151019356043.126123.150911851043&type=1&theater

  128. Bomb(Mi)chele

    Bravo!! Your rant was the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time (I have to get out more). I laughed so hard and so loud that my boss looked at me suspiciously. Probably because I am usually sitting here in my cubicle at work crying from boredom and the mind-numbing work. I love Jared (hotness personified) but I am 100% an Acklesholic (aka a Jensen girl). Mmmmmmm, Jensen. He could get a woman pregnant just by looking at her. His green eyes and his perfect mouth alone could end world hunger. And his voice *shiver*. All that heat and sensitivity wrapped up in a beautiful package of badassery are just too too much. Wait, what was I talking about?! Oh right, your rant! You are hysterical and I loved it! Thanks for the laugh; I am so following you. Well, I guess I should get back to fantasizing about Jensen. Uhm, I mean I should get back to work. Right. Back to work…

  129. This is so funny. It made me laugh. I can’t believe some people took it seriously – I knew a few sentences in you were joking. It’s true, sadly, that not everyone can be Jared (or Jensen), but your fiance is lucky to have someone with a great sense of humor to watch Supernatural with her. ;)

  130. This is maybe the 20th time I read this article, and it still manages to make me laugh. :D

  131. I felt like a giggle tonight, so went back and reread your article. Dude, you are funny! My husband would like to stand next to you and punch Jensen in the junk…he’s the one melting my butter!!!

  132. Great write! You’re right! Jared seems like “the perfect man”. Only Gen can say the trues! And sometimes it is really hard to come back in reality to my own husband! He is a very friendly man,but like you are writing, no man can like the dream man and I think it’s sometimes hard for him too. But at the end we married because we love each other and that’s the reality! But sometimes women need a little dream! And I think you too, maybe Pamela Anderson or another nice woman! At the end I think that Jared is a great actor, a very very good looking, friendly, funny guy and he will be a great father for his son and a lovely husband to Gen and many woman are envious of her! (Sorry for my english!)

  133. STFU HES THE SEXYEST MAN ALIVE MOTHER FUCKER, YOUR JUST FUCKING JELOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  134. LOL… I’m very late in finding this blog, but it’s brilliant. Well done!

    I also loved (and lol’d) to some of your responses to comments: “I am, I am, in fact, prepared to nominate him as the next incarnation of the Buddha” and “On the evening that his child was conceived, there was a disturbance in the Force!”

    Like your finance I think all the Winchester men are sizzling, but I have a soft spot for the baby Winchester and I’m very keen to find out if there is in fact a support group for all the people he has ruined. Thanks for a good laugh!

  135. Sam (That really is my name!)

    As a huge Supernatural fan, I found this hilarious! And so very true (although I am more partial to Jensen myself). There was just one flaw in your post. He doesn’t adopt shelter kittens. His charity of choice is “A Dog’s Life Rescue”. As an avid disliker of cats, I think this makes him even more perfect! One more reason to detest the man. LOL :) Thanks for the laugh!

  136. whey hate jared he has done niothing to afend any one he is sweet kind honest and really good at doing his job . and yes he is very fing hot so is all the other supernaturual actors even when the play in other movies . so take you rude remarksd and look in the mirror he is just trying to mak a livivng just like us .

  137. Oh man!
    I’am Sam!girl and also fan of Jared, this article is awesome, God…i laugh so hard.
    Well done :)

    Ps : don’t afraid, you’re cute too.

  138. OMG!!!
    read it like over and over again and still cracked up like the first time.
    great article, and yes, Jared is soooooo handsome <3

  139. Zdsupernatural

    So this whole this is basically showing how jealous u r of Jared and I do no that pic of Jared is photoshopped so next time if u want to make fun of someone please don’t make it sound like ur jealous of them and don’t use a photoshopped picture

    • Lol, believe it or not, I’m not actually jealous of Jared. I wrote the piece entirely in jest, and of course the picture of Jared is photoshopped, unless he has been hiding the fact that he is a secret messenger of God (a theory that, with evidence, I am willing to consider). I assure you (and the insane number of other people who have accused me of having a grudge against the man) that I bear him no ill will and that the article was meant purely as entertainment/comedy. Jared himself has actually read the piece and responded via twitter. You can find his response at https://twitter.com/jarpad/status/211281470692659202. By all accounts, he is a really cool guy and if he can find it in himself to laugh at harmless jest, then I hope you can as well. Otherwise I apologize for the offense and will pledge to persevere in a less obnoxious vein. Molte grazie!

    • It saddens and disappoints me that so many of my fellow Supernatural fans are such blithering idiots that they neither recognize satire when they see it; nor bother reading many of the comments which came before, in which it is made crystal clear the spirit in which this article was written. Sincerest of apologies to the brilliant author of superior satire, for the dregs of the fandom, who, so insecure with their own standing in the world, see only criticism; and who perceive anything but the most obviously sterling remarks as blatant criticism. You deserve much better for your sharp wit!!

  140. You are awesome. I am personally madly in love with Jared Padalecki (Our marriage is so secret, even he doesn’t know about it.) But I admire your humor and acceptance to your fiance’s completely reasonable obsession. I also admire the way you respond to people who took this post too seriously. Thank you for making me laugh and don’t let the haters get you down! :)

  141. I feel you bro

    Finally someone understands! I FUCKING HATE HIM. I will destroy

  142. This is one of the funniest things I’ve ever read. Thanks for the laugh, man. This is great!

  143. hey….whatz more funny than the article is the way u responded with ur comments to those idiots without an ounce of sense of humour…cant believe how stupid some fans can go crazy..u r very funny nd in a very casual way…i love my sammy darling though i righteously support dean too for his equally hardcore raw sexiness..i really envy GEN.lucky her!!!and even its a very old post i wanted to comment coz i was laughing like hell especially seeing how mad few idiots ranted at u without understanding the article.but u kept up ur cool man!!!

  144. this is friggin funny in dean’s words..to be clear i love my sammy darling and am totally deeply head over heels in love with him.the article is funny in a very casual way..but watz more funny is the way some idiots responded without an ounce of humour…i laughed and laughed and fell off the bed coz of that mainly thinking how could people be so insane without being able to understand a simple joke.but u kept up ur cool man…

  145. I have no idea how I ended up here, but I almost gave myself a hernia from laughing so hard!

  146. Hilarious article. What’s not hilarious, or even funny in the slightest, is the amount of people out there without a sense of humor. It’s shocking that so many people could be so dense. And what’s worse is that these intellectual doorknobs are out there running loose in society; driving cars and making our food. It’s a sad world indeed.

  147. Man..this is HILARIOUS… Well done. And, as you can see, when someone in the Supernatural Fandom thinks their beloved show/actor is being attacked, the claws come out. Please don’t judge the rest of us based on the crazies lol. Oh, and thanks for the laugh!

  148. I started Season 1 a month ago and thanks to Netflix I’m in the middle of Season 7!! Glad I found this blog, although I’m two years late. I, like Jared and the majority who’ve commented, thought this was really funny. The only way I can explain the negative responses is if those people stopped reading after the first paragraph. I get deciding not to read the rest because you think it will be negative, but if you’re going to post a comment, it might be best to go ahead and read the whole thing. Otherwise your comments are based on assumptions and we know what they say about assuming…

  149. Hey! I realize this is kind of off-topic but I had to ask.
    Does managing a well-established blog such as yours take a large amount of work?
    I am brand new to writing a blog but I do write
    in my diary every day. I’d like to start a blog so I can share my personal experience and feelings online.
    Please let me know if you have any suggestions or tips for new aspiring blog owners.
    Thankyou!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s